APRÈS

Après Sessions embrace embodied and progressive practices. Holistic Health. Train Your Brain. Find Your Freedom.

 

What’s next?  SESSION IT

 

Our holistic approach to optimal health and performance empowers you to discover your true potential.

 

Everything we do is about finding your freedom.

 

Why “Après”? Because “after” coaching, you will find your line.   

 

Inspired by riding mountains and surfing oceans, Après Coaching Sessions are a nod to the discipline and diligence necessary to master these epic environments, the freedom found in doing so, and the reward of post-excursion celebrations known as après-ski. Après Sessions, on and off the mountain, are holistic meaning an integrated whole experience.

 

Holistic health coaching considers the whole human system to spearhead what we find in the state of “flow” resulting in optimal performance and wellness in all realms of life.

 

Joni Madere - Teach. Coach. Consult.

 

HOLISTIC HEALTH, HOLISTIC HEALTH COACHING, HUMAN DESIGN, LIFESTYLE DESIGN, LIFESTYLE, FOOD, WHOLE FOODS, NUTRITION, EAT, SLEEP, DRINK WATER, MOVE, EXERCISE, FITNESS, YOGA, MEDITATION, COACH, COACHES, COACHING, HEALTH, WELLNESS, HEALING, LIFE, MINDSET, GOALS, CAREER, BUSINESS, EXECUTIVE, STARTUP, STARTUPS, CREATIVES, ARTISTS, ENTREPRENEURS, NEUROBIOLOGY, PSYCHOLOGY, PHYSIOLOGY, TECHNOLOGY, PHARMACOLOGY, FIND YOUR FREEDOM, FREEDOM, MIND BODY SPIRIT, MINDBODY, TRAVEL, TRAVEL WELL, TAKE LIFE BACK, TAKE ACTION, MAKE IT HAPPEN, FIND YOUR LINE

Filtering by Tag: ego

Getting Gritty and Going One Step Beyond

We aren't just speaking on your athletic endeavors or your success in business, your wedding ring, nor your social media following. Well, some of those things are pieces of the puzzle regarding getting gritty to get to where you want to be. But the external is far from what is authentically living a holistic lifestyle. Appearances are one thing. Only you know what is truly going on within your world.

Did a potential business partner question why you negated what they brought to table per your request? Were you respectful and authentic in your response? Did you respond at all? One example. These types of life happenings are always worth revisiting. The only way to go beyond is to first acknowledge what is.

The willingness to get a little gritty - and even a little scrappy - to get to where we want to be begins by committing to cultivating awareness. Meditation is certainly one way to begin.

Cultivating Awareness of the Necessary External Grit + Cultivating Awareness of the Necessary Internal Grit = Change is a Comin’ 

If you haven’t already become aware of the external grittiness necessary, welp, that would be step one. The things you want do not formulate out of thin air. But if you are here, you already know this.

Whether you want to step up a level within your physical health or within all of your relationships, by cultivating awareness of external grit, I’m referring to the physicality and the tenacity. The next step of taking daily action will not happen without cultivating awareness. Yes, this may seem obvious. But there are also key elements to working smart versus working hard. Ask me.

The action includes the commitment to rise each day and not just move through the day, but move through best practices. We move through rituals and movement, through the things we want to do least, moving from duty to duty, meeting others halfway, with willingness to let go of things (that cocktail or toke, for example) and people (self-serving, needy, codependent, et al) who pull us off track. We stay the course and constantly course correct until we close our eyes each night.

The internal grit is not always so obvious. However, it is far more important and exactly what lends to our ability to gracefully move through the external grit – and then some. Anyone can elbow his or her way through a race, or into a meeting, or even into a relationship. So circle back to… how you do anything is how you do everything. Most importantly, this internal tenacity is what lends to our ability to navigate what lurks in the shadows, inevitably popping up when we least expect it.

This internal grit - the willingness to look at oneself every single day - and how to navigate what comes up, is no small task. Why? Because it means not only discovering what is your part in what you don’t like in your life, but actually owning your part in what you don’t like in your life. Life is not fair. Many are handed far too many experiences beyond their control. However, with tools and techniques at our fingertips – because we have practiced them so much - we can cultivate an environment of welcoming these challenges with an open mind seeing them as gifts versus anything with negative connotation. No small feat.

If you just balled your eyes out to someone you hardly know. No sweat. It happens. We come back to our “beginner’s mind”, we notice, breathe, inquire, see and meet what comes up both big and small with curiosity, gain understanding, learn the lessons, integrate them, and eventually transition through them to where we prefer to stand tall. Much like the yoga pose example, we cannot ever ignore the difficult dark parts of the psyche because they will eventually take us down much like falling out of that yoga pose due to lack of a strong base and quiet mind.
This newfound awareness often requires a neutral eye so that we can uncover what we cannot see in ourselves.

Everyone has these blind spots. An example would even be repetitive phrases we no longer hear ourselves saying because we have been repeating them for so long. Sometimes a friend repeating this back to us can not only be revealing, but a little shocking. As Gloria Steinem said,

“The truth will set you free, but first it will piss you off.”

So while it will still piss us off, it is usually much better received and integrated with the correct info, tools, and techniques from a more neutral perspective.

Revealing what we cannot see on our own may require stepping out of one’s comfort zone by hiring said neutral eye. Within holistic health coaching, we too, hire coaches. My most recent hire is someone who excelled to the point of being able to fully retire for the rest of his life at under the age of 35. Instead of wooping it up on an around the world vacation, he decided to step further into his purpose, dove deep into self transformation work, and now coaches and consults within business and life to share what he learned and support the growth and progression of others. Hiring accountability comes with this whole trendy cliché, but truth, of “one step beyond our comfort zone is where the magic happens”.

This often means stepping way far beyond where our egos wanna go. Egos get a bad rap. We need the ego to make shit happen. But like anything else out of balance they too will hold us back. Doesn’t matter if our ego is blown up or shot down, either way, there is lack of balance.

Perhaps our ego being out of balance does not hold us back in our work given this is a lot of surface/external/material stuff. But if not in our work, perhaps it has held us back in our intimate relationships, or even in an area no one but ourselves are aware of, but that we must resolve within ourselves in order to find peace.

It’s much easier to step into “I’m going to be the best at XYZ so I’m going to travel halfway across the world to do XYZ with world renowned XYZ and publicize it for the world to see. This may assist in finding material success, but then there it is for all to see... the very apparent, even in high performers, continual seeking of validation from outside sources versus within oneself. Therefore, it is super to work with a coach who has also done the deep personal work, not to perfection, but to vast understanding, in supporting our own deep dives towards transformation.

Circling back - notice I said zones - plural. Yup – within all realms we must look within, find the gritty darker sections and move through them versus around them. Much like that yoga pose, you can go through all sorts of contortions to get to what looks like the pose to the untrained eye. But upon closer inspection there are all sorts of body parts out of alignment. This means we might get to the pose – for a second or two – but we will not be able to maintain the pose without doing the practice it takes to achieve strength, flexibility, and correct, safe alignment, essentially the truths. And even those able to hold the pose – that too is external. Transitioning that work off of the yoga mat is essential. Finding, building, maintaining these truths eventually leads to day-in and day-out practices including comfortably, effortlessly holding that yoga pose sans the physical and mental gymnastics – while calmly, smoothly, and surely breathing. 

The natural inclination is to avoid the yoga poses we do not like. These are the poses that we usually need to lean into and practice. Regarding embodied cognition – if our heart has been broken, moving through “heart openers” can literally be physically as well as emotionally extremely confronting. But eventually, opening these areas of the body physically, can lend to opening them back up emotionally. This is embodied cognition at its finest. Same in other realms of life - we run away from the parts we don’t like, that may not feel good, that scare us, that we just don’t want to deal with, while they are exactly what we need to face, head on, stepping out of our comfort zones, right through the door into our full capacities and everything we really want.

So how do we be sure to incorporate getting gritty?

With daily rituals, structure, meditation, movement you can quickly be on your way each day. Ready to après? Session it. But truly getting gritty internally, what some therapists and coaches term “shadow work”, is where we can really level up, which washes out into the world in beautiful positive waves. And then there is always another level, right? I would be happy to suggest a few ways I have personally employed plus some exciting upcoming offerings. Super excited to guide you and your teams through these processes. #SessionIt

Find Your Next Why

Make New Turns Today

When we are stoked and mostly slaying it at life, we have no doubt discovered that notorious “why” – our own unique “why” that makes us tick. If you are reading this, chances are you already know and you’re in your flow. But change is constant, and as lovers of life, we know we must remain adaptable, light on our feet, evolve, and enthusiastically look to what’s next.

What’s next is that next “why” that always pops up around the next corner.

Discovering our initial “why” was the way to uncover our truths, set intentions, make change happen, and meet goals. If you have no idea what the hell I’m talking about – no big deal – just ask. Once we get to those initial truths, why we want to do what we want to do, it takes some serious grit.

We have to look at a hell of lot of things we don’t really want to look at in order to move through the darker more challenging spaces. It is the only way to “follow the light” as the fluffier parts of wellness world like to advise. Yay. You’ve got your why. You’ve moved thru some serious shit. You are on your way.  Only to find a brand new crop of soon to be unearthed truths that will want to emerge from the next dark corner. Sounds frustrating. Yep. It is. So it’s ok to scream bloody murder in the street for all to hear. Let it pass. Breathe. Put your big-girl pants back on - and strut.

Yep. This is your next big opportunity to ask yourself, "why". Why is this coming up? Why is this happening? Why is the Universe handing me another doozie? Why do I even want this? What was I thinking? And that’s just the beginning. But YOUR why is the way. As a holistic health practitioner, coach and consultant, I am your neutral sounding board. Let’s session it and get to the root of this next truth so that we aren’t wasting precious time. Your why really really matters. Let’s work smart – today. Then you can spend a lot more of this lovely life getting outside, traveling the world, going to dance class, eating doughnuts. Seriously.

Essentially, just when we think we know why… we inevitably emerge into the next set of unknowns. These little buds will eventually pop up whether we are ready for them or not. If we haven’t looked at all realms, they will pop up again and again. And as one of my teachers likes to say, they will be back – with friends! So with that, it never hurts to continue to seek out our own self-awareness, go deep, gently unlock the truths, and find ways to gracefully stroll through them, streamline them, and bloom into the next phase.

How?

1.  Gain an outside neutral perspective as it is mostly impossible to see outside of ourselves, see past ourselves, and get out of our own way. If this is way too much for the ego to handle, it’s your world and you can stay right where you are… the choice is 100% yours. If you are feeling like “Hell yeah! I am so frickin’ ready.” – find your holistic health coach – someone you can really have fun with, but who will also hold you to owning your shit - and you just might discover an even deeper truth you were not even aware of that has been temporarily holding you back within a certain realm of life.

2.  Discovering that deeper truth allows you to gain perspective – again – pivot, and watch the positives ripple out into all of your experiences. Wow. Yes, it’s true. Solutions often exist in seemingly unrelated areas. No one is safe from blind spots. Everything is connected.

3.  The ripple affect, much like a wave, moves through your entire life affecting not only all realms of your experience, but also the experiences of those around you. If that matters to you at all, becoming aware and shifting your mindset can bring you - and your peeps – all that you desire.

Everything is connected. I will say it over and over. How you do anything is how you do everything - from transitioning from one yoga pose to another to taking care of tenants moving in and out of your rental homes.  So finding neutral support is just another graceful way of creating space in order to reveal blind spots - step one. Your holistic health truly depends on step one. Second, since you are already a rockstar, implementing small changes, little tweaks here and there, is absolute in order to discover the whole-hearted “why’s” over and over again taking ourselves from where we are now, to where we want to be. Today. Tomorrow. Next lifetime ;)

When we are so entangled within our own day-to-days, stories, melodramas, dramas, patterns, neural pathways, samskaras, and those ludicrous conventional timelines, it can be almost impossible to break out of the cycle even if you are a seriously driven high performer.

The most successful, brightest, creative, and yes, especially the happiest people, are continually finding new ways to remain open, move through current experiences, and then the next phase, and the next, because yup, there is always a next phase. 

We all know the old adage that “change is the only thing that is constant”. Even our cells regenerate every seven years. So our physical being alone goes through plenty of constant change for us to manage. Beyond the physical, we are also constantly moving through mental and emotional change and challenge as well. The highest performing, and more notably the most at peace individuals, are willing to look at the big picture, accept it, and take the necessary steps to optimize their health, wellness, performance and wellbeing – over and over.  This is one part of how they arrived at where they are today… often along with a little or even a lot of luck and support along the way. But wherever you are, start where you are. Find your next why.

Holistic health includes nutrition, hydration & physical health, movement & exercise, home and work environments, relationships – all kinds, social life & community, your version of spirituality, creativity, career, finances, continuing education, mental health, emotional health, and overall joy. These are the basics. Within each we must find ways to level up, challenge, and stretch ourselves in order to progress. Without progression we are stagnant. Last I checked, and especially if you are reading this, you definitely are not into that.

No one is perfect. No one knows exactly what is going on. No one has it all figured out all of the time. Find your sounding board. Find your next why. Session it. You're amazing.

Discipline Creates Freedom

 
 

No one knows this better than you.  The entrepreneur, the professional athlete, the exec at the job you absolutely love.

With discipline, in the physical realm, we create time.  Time is freedom.  Freedom also exists in other realms…

You made it happen.  You created a life you love.  But something is still missing.

Could your health be better so that when you do have free time you are not so exhausted and blown out that all you can do is lie in front of the TV?  Or go on a vacation that doubles as an adventure instead of lying on a beach the entire time trying to recapture the sleep you lost over the last few months?  

Were you a professional athlete 15 years ago who is still hanging on to what once was?  Spending your current time still trying to ride that wave, numbing yourself when you can’t deal with life, and eating poorly to the point of detriment?  

Do you claim to be a writer because you’ve written for a magazine or two, yet that book, that book you’ve spent 20 years thinking about is still just a dream?

Do you call meetings that cut into the efficiency of your employees’ work?  Therefore cutting into overall production, costing your bottom line? 

Are you having cocktails instead of adding a happy hour run, swim, or outdoor adventure to your schedule, yet still saying you are waaaay too busy and have no time for that?

Is your quality time spent looking outward at what everyone else is doing instead of looking within, digging deep, and committing time every single day to your personal and professional projects? 

Or - are you BE-ing in the present?  Are you observing your actual current status?  Are you observing how you speak to yourself, therefore how you speak to your personal and professional relations?  Are you observing how your thoughts, language, and actions affect not only yourself, but those around you?  Are you noticing where you are now, and then one step further – where you want to be?  

Here’s the deal…  you have already found some success.  Taking just a moment out of your oh so busy schedule to really take a good look at yourself can go a long way.  The problem is that sometimes we are so in our egos and so busy being “busy” that we cannot see past ourselves.  We think we are doing everything possible to make our personal and professional lives better, but we simply are not.

A fresh set of eyes coming from a completely neutral place, someone who knows nothing about who you are or who you once were, can easily examine any hang ups and expertly guide you to what’s next.  But be ready.  A great coach has serious skills. They will call you out on your shit before you even know what is happening.  They will not be afraid to tell you what no one else will dare say to you. 

All the moments pointing the finger at others, telling people what you need, telling people how things are going to go, compartmentalizing, attempting to control everything, speaking rather than listening, time lost on social media, time spent avoiding versus taking responsibility, time wasted walking away versus stepping into your fears… some of these examples just might fall into the lack of discipline category.   

Life is all about balance and it should be all about FUN.  Fun is simply not possible if your current status is full of numbing and filling voids in unhealthy ways, asking others to meet you halfway, but not doing the same, and ultimately looking outward versus inward.  Fun is freedom.  Freedom evolves from time.  Time evolves from discipline.  Discipline creates freedom. 

A coach is not going to tell you what you want to hear.  A coach is going to hold you accountable.  Then with the discipline you create, there’s a good chance that in the future you could add another bigger better longer adventure to your life.  No matter your situation, freedom in all realms is always an option.

Are you up for the challenge? 

 

You must learn to get in touch with the innermost essence of your being.

This true essence is beyond the ego.

It is fearless; it is free; it is immune to criticism; it does not fear any challenge.

It is beneath no one, superior to no one, and full of magic, mystery and enchantment.

                                                                                                                    -Deepak Chopra